spirit.

As I wrote last week, I've been feeling overwhelmed and anxious and stressed as of late, and it's really been taking a toll on me mentally and physically. I know I haven't been in a good place, so I'm really working on improving my current way of being. Some seasons in life are just hard. … Continue reading spirit.

hi, i’m bela.

I don't want to do this. Even as I am writing this, my hands are shaking, my mind is racing, and my heart is fluttering. I don't want people to know this side of me. I don't want to let my guard down. I don't want to seem weak. I don't want to be vulnerable. … Continue reading hi, i’m bela.

head meets heart.

Last month was Men's Health Month. Statistically, it is estimated that 1 in 10 men struggle with mental illness. However, men's diagnoses often go undiagnosed, as men are more likely to ignore or downplay their emotional wellbeing, rather than seek counsel and acceptance. The stigma against expressing their deepest feelings is so strong that men choose … Continue reading head meets heart.

one word.

At the beginning of 2019, my pastor preached a series of sermons that centered around choosing one word to cling to this year. After choosing one word, he encouraged us to choose one Bible verse, one thought, and one statement that were all tied to that one word. I like directed activity, especially as it … Continue reading one word.

tapestry.

I was pretty angry towards God and pretty bitter towards his world. How could a loving God blind me? Why? Anyway, [he, the priest, said] God's plan is like a beautiful tapestry, and the tragedy of being human is that we only get to see it from the back, with all the ragged threads and … Continue reading tapestry.

resolve.

Last week I got a new tattoo. Some tattoos I have simply because they are pretty or represent something I like. Other tattoos have deeper, subtler, often very personal meanings behind them. This new ink involved the latter. If you've been reading the blog, or know my story in any capacity, you're aware that I … Continue reading resolve.

difference.

Over these past couple of weeks, two lovely people (Muriel and Tamara) have shared their stories on this blog. Next month the site will go under construction as I revamp the layout, add regular contributors, and jump-start a site that features consistent content and useful resources. When I started this site, I had no idea … Continue reading difference.

the velveteen rabbit.

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit. "Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt." "Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?" "It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes … Continue reading the velveteen rabbit.

hi, i’m tamara.

"What does it feel like?" he asked, while we hiked along Bear's Den through the pine needles and summer humidity. Strange. We'd only been friends for about 2 hours and 45 minutes, but I'd already told him some of my darkest secrets. Hesitating while I searched for the right words, I realized he was the … Continue reading hi, i’m tamara.

hi, i’m muriel.

A note on this work: I have always secretly wanted the experience of sitting in a coffee shop writing a blog post. At the age of 25, I am proud to have achieved that life goal. “Time, as it grows old, teaches all things.” - Aeschylus Stuck in time. Those are the words that intuitively … Continue reading hi, i’m muriel.