Lately I’ve felt like a body of anxiety.

Mentally, I’ve been overthinking, over-stressing, and obsessing over every little thing. Physically, I get headaches, stomachaches, and cold sweats. Emotionally, I’m irritable and push everyone away.


Photo by nikko macaspac on Unsplash

It happens sometimes. And usually there’s not just one big cause. It’s when I let a bunch of things pile up, and I keep going, going, going despite the fact that my mindbody has been urging me to slow down (which is what I’ve been really trying to do, hence several posts I’ve written on it). But I ignored that this past week, and I’ve been paying for it.

The other night I went to bed after midnight (when I stopped working), and I set my alarm for 6am. When my alarm went off, I got up and let the dogs out, but then I just laid back down. My body ached with that heavy exhaustion where you feel like you’re just filled with sand. But as I lay there, physically heavy, mentally I was beating myself up for not having started cleaning the house. The extra time in bed wasn’t restful at all, yet I couldn’t find the energy to move, so it was a lose-lose situation.

I regressed. I ignored what I’d been learning and practicing in my ongoing recovery. And there were repercussions.

It happens to all of us.

But it’s crucial that we don’t stay there, and ideally we catch ourselves before we completely burnout (like I did).

So here’s to another week of starting fresh, making better choices, and remembering the rewards that come from pursuing good health.

If you have a story about mental illness—whether personal or concerning a loved one—please consider sharing your experience by writing a guest post, doing an interview with one of us, or joining the team as a regular contributor. Even if you aren’t at a place yet where you feel comfortable disclosing your name, the church body needs your voice. Let’s shine a light on the darkness, together.


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